Coffee Break with the Chief Barista
April 2010
    I assume that most of us are aware of the idea floating around that our thoughts and feelings create our experiences. When people encounter this idea for the first time, they seem resistant to it, citing all the reasons why they had nothing to do with that “bad thing” that happened. Interesting how we love to take responsibility for the good stuff, but we recoil at the idea that we had anything to do with the bad stuff.
    I recently met someone who, no matter what is happening, finds ways to stay positive. He doesn’t launch pity parties about what’s going wrong. It occurs to me that regardless of what is happening, we still have the choice of feeling good or feeling bad. We say, “I’ll be happy when this thing happens.” In essence, we are saying, “I choose to be unhappy until this thing happens. Even though I could choose to be happy, I think I’ll just be miserable until that one thing happens.”
    It’s not easy to be joyful all the time, especially when — for so many years — we’ve trained ourselves to focus on vivid pictures of the bad stuff. But we can begin to let go of those unproductive, habitual thought patterns that keep us from recognizing opportunities for growth.
    What matters is how we respond to the unwanted experiences. Do you become deflated when you have a flat tire? Do you have a melt-down when the furnace stops working? Look for ways of meeting the challenges without becoming upset — anticipate the best possible outcome. The best part is that we can feel good while solving the issue.
    So look for reasons to feel good and to be appreciative. And pretty soon, feeling good will feel normal to you. Remember, we cannot get sad enough to help the sad people in the world. We cannot get sick enough to help all the sick people in the world. But, we can get well enough and grateful enough and joyful enough to have a positive effect on the  people around us and our planet Earth.

    Kindly,

    Marian Rein